The Secret

ohhhh my brain, my mind, my worst enemy, my best friend. We all have those thoughts. No one can imagine what goes on in my brain every second. No one can imagine the way I want to help people out. No one can see that I am the one with the most problems. The way I am programmed has a specific code that no one else has written before. The code that makes me pull into the meijer on haggerty to help someone get their car out of the road during traffic after working out. The code that made me treat my ex like she owed me something. The code that makes me want to smoke so I don’t feel the pain. The reason I do makes me who I am. The way I try to control things that will never cease control. How do I back up my promises? Why do I not accomplish what I have set out to do? When will things turn around? What makes me tick these days?

When I first started this blog site Writing 101 really set the stage for me to inspire my writing. They gave me a platform on what to write about for each day. Though I only continued doing it for five or six days, I learned something invaluable about myself. I wrote all of those blogs and it came from my thoughts. I was the platform for my own creation of this blog. If anyone has read any of these blogs and if you were patient enough to read my first one (lolz its amateuresk), I said I didn’t quite know what this blogs purpose would serve. Why have we learned as people to not give our secrets away? The secrets that make life worth living. The secrets that make us grow. The secrets that make us bond with one another. I am no Ralph Waldo Emerson, I am no Mark Twain, I am no Socrates, for I am no Plato. I am my own person, for I have something unique to contribute to this world.  I am sure that they all started at the bottom as Drake would say. They didn’t share the secret that boggles my mind every time I recognize someone not being their true self. Stop looking for secrets and you will find more answers than you ever thought you could. I have looked for a secret the last eight years of my life. I looked for something that was not there. I looked so I didn’t have to look in the mirror. I walked down the path of fear with the least resistance. Thinking it would lead to a more joyous life. Instead I had a 5000 pound bar keeping me still. Pushing me down showing me another way out. Just another link to attach to my chain. I answered fears calling with another fearful question dragging myself down until I found an easier solution. I chose no pain so I had no fear. I had no backbone or will to fight thinking life would work itself out. Boy or Girl was I wrong.

Time to break free from the chain. For it is only as real as you think it is. The finish line is closer than you think. Make those mistakes for they exist to make us grow. We have no time to kill. Society can be a burden or excuse we use when we don’t succeed. Society didn’t stick us on the bar. We put ourselves there. It provides comfort and all the answers that you seek. All the answers except the secret that no one person can preach. You hold the key to breaking free from the chain, since you put yourself there in the first place. If you were always right then you would never have to fix anything and we would live in a perfect world. Just realize every moment you have a chance to make a difference. Right as you feel the chain wrapping around your ankle, know you have the key within you to take it off whenever you want. Test yourself for you shall fall. Falling is the greatest achievement because you have so much higher you can go. Your foundation so wide as a result. Take a leap of faith and take that leap of faith again. Hope you say something that no one else would have thought of. For you friends will respect you so much more than if you just agree with everything they say. IF you say something wrong just know you are that one less answer away from the truth. The only way to get there is to keep making mistakes.

That Thing

We all think about things. I can’t pinpoint a thing. Things what an abstract word to describe such tangible quantities in the world. Technically everything is a thing. All the words we use to communicate they don’t mean a thing. The walls we climb over, the hurdles, the oppression, they all don’t mean a thing. I can have all of the money in the world, but i’d still be searching for that thing. I always had a sense of security, got stuck in the past. Now I feel like I am just going to be another thing. I hate dawging on myself but that’s starting to become a thing. Keep up or you’re down. It’s the first person who finishes that doesn’t need another thing. The way you talk, the respect for people, the generosity, that is more my sort of thing. I’m stuck into many moments, so many possible, so many more than I need. I Need to stop pinpointing things.